BETTER but not best.

i am a lot better in almost every way.

the bad thing is.... i figured out was wrong & what i have to do.

& it's something i've been fighting off for a while,

i really really don't want to do it.

but i know i have to.

i'm glad i have my mom to give me such good advice,

i just have to have faith that what is meant to happen will happen

this could be one of the hardest things i'll have to do.

there is no way around it, i know in the long run it'll be a good thing for me.

i can do this...

in some ways i feel peace for ending the fight within myself,

i pray and pray and pray things will turn out alright.. meaning:

how i want them to

haha, darn my stubborness

well i'm vague for a reason.. sorry.

here's my song of the day.

the stars lean down to kiss

& i lay awake and miss you

pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

cause i'll doze off safe & soundly

but i miss your arms around me...

i'll send a postcard to you dear,

cause i WISH YOU WERE HERE.

i'll watch the night turn light blue

but it's not the same without you

because it takes 2 to whisper quietly..

the silence isn't so bad

till i look at my hands and feel sad,

cause the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit PERFECTLY

i'll find the pose in new ways

though i haven't slept in 2 days

cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone

DRENCHED

in vanilla twilight

i'll sit on the front porch all night

waist deep in thought because when i think of you...

i don't feel so alone.

i don't feel sooo alone.

i don't feel sooooo alone.

AS MANY TIMES AS I BLINK I'LL THINK OF YOU... TONIGHT

when violet eyes get brighter

& heavy wings grow lighter

i'll taste the sky & feel ALIVE again.

and i'll forget the world that i knew, but i swear i won't forget you

oh if my voice could reach into the past i'd whisper in your ear:

"oh darling, i wish you were here... "

one word... PERFECTION