so far this year...

alright, the internet better not fail on me this time! haha

well, yesterday morning Melissa (roomie) & I woke up at

5:40am to get these excellent parking passes.

the office opened at 8am bytheway.

when we got there we were close to 150th in line just to give you an idea of

how important this is. however, we did get our RESERVED UNDERGROUND parking passes. $80 later... ouch.

So far Liberty Square has been very successful at taking my money.

BUT,

I am very happy with my apartment (which is still being assembled) & my roommate & our ward. A lot of potential in there... if you know what i mean :] haha

how else do i meet boys!??? come on.

it is funny because i am sure that a lot of people have assumptions about me.

like every body does to everyone else... making judgments before getting to actually know someone. I do it too! Well, I know myself & I know who I want to be & I know i'm really hard on myself about my short comings. But I don't know what you see.

Do guys I meet know I go long long amounts of time between relationships?

because they are not just another person to make me feel safe. they are MINE, & they matter.

I learned something valuable today while doing my philosophy homework.

going through sorrows & disappointments & struggles doesn't make you a weak person. It makes you understanding.

knowledgeable.

over the course of 2010 i have struggled to over a heartbreaking trial

i have overcome this ordeal & feel so so wise.

but when i relapse in sadness, i'd get so frustrated at myself thinking...

now i just undid everything i worked so hard to conqueror.

now this is another wall i have to climb over.

NO!

that is not true.

the sadness & life changing heart break i had to go through

& the length of time it took me to let go of it

does in no way reflect weakness

it reflects wisdom & lessons being learned so i could gain

understanding

of anguish & bliss

and the outstanding beauty of both.

i could grow closer to my best friend Jesus Christ

so i can & will never be able to forget the nights he lifted my burden

& the days he carried me because i couldn't walk alone

that he felt all of that.

for me.

lessons like that & many many more about life

and even the tender memories of times past that tug on my heart

make me remember i am alive & i felt with my entire soul

because that's who i am

i am a passionate person

if you are in my life

you matter.

so there ya go.

another lesson learned, & so many more lessons to go :]

i have soooo much to learn.

especially about myself haha

can i ask you a question?

why is it SO SO very easy to forget who you are?

to feel insignificant & worthless.

i suppose that is why when you find that within yourself

that is why so many people try to tear that away from you.

they are afraid of you

& what you can do.

because you have found what we have all lost

what we are searching for.

BUT

what we can all find.

our light

this will be a good....

GREAT year :]

it is coming....

that thing that i've been waiting for,

i feel it.

so as soon as i got back from France/Scotland

I came straight back to work, moving, then school.

it's been a crazy ride that i can finally step back & appreciate

1 year ago i could have slipped away without notice

but this year,

this year i have made a life for myself.

Meagan Mariah

i've got a lot going on but in a good way!

i wouldn't have it any other stressful way haha.

so i'm starting my work field hours next tuesday :]

which means i'll be volunteering in an Elementary school class

& might get to teach a lesson

or help with a project

or grade papers

ahhh, i was so meant to do this.

YOU GUYS! i'm happy!

what makes me smile:

(first day of school pic)

LETTERS!, LAUGHTER, THE SPIRIT, UNDERSTANDING,

the challenge to discover what i don't understand.

the perfect melody

the perfect lyric

the perfection of an imperfect life :]

pure, honest, loyal friends

spontaneity

institute: Dating & courtship haha.

i had to :]

& so far, i'm impressed

p.s. Cori Fox (right) is responsible for the documentation of my 2nd year in college so far.

& Let me tell you something. that girl is special,

she just needs to figure it out.

she can do ANYTHING she wants to do

& could single handedly get you a 6 pack from laughing so hard

just sayin.

Cori & I working the GREENOUT welcome back dance at UVU. so fun!

the girls + Chewy on Stage.

i heart photo booth ;]

well... so far this is my life & it's been 1 week of the semester.

bring

it

on.

♥